Marc Lottering is a sight to behold - at least that is what his 76-year-old mother is for ever telling him.
And, having been told this so often, the man with the most recognisable hairstyle in Cape Town thought to himself, "I might as well go international".
Lottering will be the master of ceremonies at the opening extravaganza of the 2003 Cricket World Cup at Newlands next Saturday, when an estimated
1,4 billion television viewers around the world will be tuned.
The comedian has agreed to tone down his brand of Cape Flats humour for the occasion. He has also asked God for a "few special favours" to coax him through what will be the biggest night of his life.
"People were worried about my Cape Flats dialect," he said.
"But this is a world-class show and there will be no time to fool around.
"I have to meet people halfway, so I won't be talking about buying gatsbys from Aneesa's.
"My family are also very excited because there will be no four-letter words... my mother's dreams have finally come true."
But all is not lost for those wanting to see and hear Marc Lottering in his Cape Flats guise - there will be an hour-long stadium prelude to the two-hour televised opening ceremony.
Lottering emphasises that discipline will be the key to his performance, during which he is to take television viewers and the 25 000-strong stadium crowd on a journey through Africa.
Discipline. "I can spell that," he muses. "D-I-S-S ..."
Lottering confesses he is not sporty and the mention of cricket steers him into excited jabber about "little white balls".
"I never played cricket, but was always a supporter of John McEnroe," he says, to hoots of laughter.
Lottering says what will help him through the ceremony will be the thousands of people on the field, "many of whom are fans of mine and will be reaching out to touch me... and I will heal them".
"Ag, and after the show my phone probably won't stop ringing," he says with a twinkle in his eye.
"You know how Steven Spielberg can get."