Facing breast cancer: a story of resilience and gratitude

MY HUSBAND'S nagging saved my life… literally.

While he’s not one to nag about anything, he was persistent about me doing my routine mammogram. It wasn’t something I prioritised, as I don’t have a family history of breast cancer. There was no lump to be felt. Neither was there pain or discomfort. I was also feeling well. So, the diagnosis came as a surprise. Even though I was required to have a biopsy, I was still feeling positive because I know enough people who had biopsies that were clear.

I remember the day that I found out my diagnosis so vividly. I had gone to work on June 18, 2024, after the long Youth Day weekend. I had my biopsy the previous Friday, so I was expecting the result, which was to be sent to the GP who is at the same practice. I was also eager for the result, as I wanted to book a trip for my husband’s milestone birthday. When my receptionist came up to my office to say the doctor wanted to see me, I immediately knew. I was calm, as I usually am. I got to see the doctor to understand the result and find out the next steps.

Being a private person, I felt uncomfortable about seeing a surgeon who I knew. The one thing that the GP said to me really helped. He said I’d have to get over this shyness as the process was going to require me to be vulnerable. My husband by then rushed over to see me until I had to continue consulting. I was able to continue the rest of the day. The one thing that always made me emotional was sharing the news with those closest to me. The thought of my parents finding out was hard.

I’m grateful that being a psychologist, I already had coping skills, unlike patients I work with, who often have to learn coping skills when a crisis hits. I didn’t want to make any decisions before going to the ashram the next morning. Spirituality is a big part of my life and plays a significant protective role when facing challenges. I accepted my diagnosis from the start, knowing that suffering is inevitable in life. I just prayed for the grace to walk this path. And I trusted that everything will unfold as it should, understanding that even things that did not go as I hoped, were actually still working out for me.

I have been truly blessed with the most compassionate and skilled medical team. I had known my surgeon, Dr Pramod Reddy, for many years and he had clearly explained the plan and given me reassurance from day one. It was my first actual meeting with my oncologist, Dr Ria David.

I had heard her speak at a Reach for Recovery event some years ago, and at the time thought that she’s a doctor that I would go to if I ever needed to. As it happened, she became my doctor and I’m so grateful to have her walk this path with me. We are lucky to have so many amazing specialists in this country. I believe that there is a right doctor for each patient, and she was this person for me. She has held my hand every step of the way, explaining how each treatment works, what to expect, what side effects to expect and how we will manage side effects.

I had a lumpectomy in July last year and was grateful that my nodes were clear, which meant that the cancer had not spread. The days following surgery were difficult. Even though it went well, my body really took strain. I’m grateful to have had such great support from my family. Being very independent, I had to learn to accept help, which was available in abundance.

The next step was a month of radiation. Because I had a hormone positive cancer (and because it had not spread), I did not need to have chemotherapy. The radiation team became like family to me, seeing them on a daily basis. What helped me was focusing on what I could control. I really wanted to drive by myself each day as the quiet drive was therapeutic for me. I also wanted to cook my own food – firstly because I love cooking and secondly so I could ensure that my meals contained the nutrients that I needed.

The most difficult part of the journey is the current phase. Because my cancer was estrogen positive, I am now on a five year plan of endocrine therapy, which are 12-weekly injections to deplete the estrogen and daily tablets. While it sounds like it should be easy, the side effects have had a significant impact on my quality of life.

Because the treatment pushes you into menopause quite abruptly, I contend with several hot flushes a day and a few that wake me up at night – regardless of the external temperature. The sleep disturbances have a huge ripple effect on other aspects of life. Other side effects include joint pain and mood disturbances – mainly not finding joy. Again, thankfully my oncologist works well with me, and we systematically continue to put things into place to address these challenges.

I still have a long way to go, but what helped most were the support from family, friends and even patients. I was mindful of what I consumed – not just food, but also what I paid attention to. I was mindful of who I took advice from and reached out to. I had to learn to slow down and even though I always thought of myself as a patient person, this journey has made me even more patient. I have never been a person to take anything for granted, but I continue to count my blessings and am grateful for everyone who has stood by me and who I met along this journey.

The biggest lesson has been the importance of routine screening and not waiting until there are symptoms. Early detection not only saves lives, but may also give us better treatment options and outcomes.

Rakhi Beekrum is a counselling psychologist in Durban North with more than 15 years’ experience in individual and couples therapy. Her expert advice has been featured in print and digital media, on radio and television. She uses her social media platforms to spread mental health.

THE POST