Diwali: a promise to ourselves

"Raghukul reet sada chali aayi, pran jaaye par vachan na jaayi,Ram Siya Ram, Siya Ram Jai Jai Ram."

The melodic proverb from Ramanand Sagar's epic television series based on the Ramayan echoes through our home in the late 1980s - powerful and profound. Musical notes merge with the distinct scent of sandalwood incense sticks burning - a memory framed beautifully by perfectly round, bright orange marigolds gently plucked from our garden. Over the years, the entire VHS collection, purchased by my parents from the iconic Roopanands takes pride of place in our cabinet.

Fast forward to my home today, that childhood nostalgia is replaced by me streaming the same song on my smart television or cellphone, in fervent prayer that my children will understand the deep meaning of the proverb.

Like Lord Ram, we too must always keep our promises and stay true to our word. It was this commitment that made it easy for Lord Ram to accept 14 years of exile. For me, this proverb has also been a benchmark for my understanding of life.

The word “reet” means customs - and growing up, I recall my late grandmother talking passionately about “reet rivaaj” - customs and traditions - that became the essence of our identity. The customs and traditions of Diwali are rich, meaningful and speak to my soul. Preparations begin weeks before - spring cleaning, shopping for the prayer and sweetmeats, deciding which Diwali hamper drive to support and buying new clothes for my sons.

I'm no expert on sweetmeats but every year I make a small portion to offer for our prayer at home, getting my sons involved too. It also calls for a little experimentation which makes it fun - like the year we melted chocolate in moulds with generous hints of mukhwas - an aromatic, refreshing mix of seeds, nuts, sweets and spices. My main offering is made early on Diwali morning. Every year, that dish is kheer - traditional rice pudding with condensed milk, ghee and almonds, and yes, I do eat it for breakfast!

The excitement on Diwali is like no other. As I wake up early in the morning, I am overwhelmed with complete gratitude for the blessing to be able to celebrate Lord Ram's journey and the joy brought to our lives, remembering that faith and prayer will carry us and the there is always light amid darkness and challenges.

The traditional three-oil bath ritual is performed first. Here, a mixture of sesame, coconut and mustard oil is used to physically cleanse the body and similarly the soul. Sitting in that mixture for a few minutes brings a sense of clarity that cannot be explained in words. It's a reminder that this is an opportunity to remove what doesn't serve you - ego and anger, and to wash it all off. And you can begin the day and year ahead with renewed hope and focus.

Once we are dressed, it's time for our family prayer, a few bhajans and my favourite, performing hawan - scared fire ceremony - together. The chanting, the purifying fire and the sense of spiritual harmony sets the tone for the day. Then, we're off to hand out gifts and meet our neighbours, and I hope my sons can stay in their Indian attire until we visit both sets of grandparents!

Lunch is a fusion meal - often a curry-infused pasta with flavourful veggies that delight my sons' tastebuds and balance off the sweetmeat overload.

As night approaches, we're back at home to light our lamps and monitor our three fur babies, sedatives on hand. My husband prepares for the possibility of rain and wind, which has become characteristic of Diwali night, by creating lamp covers with recyclable plastic bottles. These line our fence and home, inviting Lord Ram's and Mother Lakshmi's blessings. We join our sons in lighting sparkles and fountain fireworks while enjoying the view from around our home in Phoenix of many families celebrating by illuminating the sky.

With our hearts brimming with joy, there is a sense of fulfillment, physically and spiritually, so supper is generally light - tea and samoosas, with friends and family visiting to share in the special moments.

Often, when everyone is winding down from the day's festivities, and I am clearing up, I get emotional. To see that lamp flickering in the stillness of the night is an affirmation of the core meaning of Diwali. Do not feel under pressure from the opulence and extravagance that has become associated with the festival over the years. Offer your humble prayers and light even a single lamp. Above all, keep that light within you burning, every day, and embrace the warmth of spirituality to guide you in all your endeavours.

As I type this, I can already feel the Diwali atmosphere blossoming. The Ram bhajan group is practising at my neighbour's house - their soulful voices carry their devotion, in sync with the tabla and manjeera - cymbals. Simultaneously, there's another soulful sound - the azaan, from my other neighbour, the mosque. I know it is going to be another beautiful Diwali in Phoenix - another coming together of mutual respect, love and honour for each other's beliefs. Because at the end - the goal is the same, for us to all strive to be good, and do good. That is the true essence of Diwali and a promise we must keep to ourselves. Shubh Diwali! 

Maya Jagjivan Kalicharan is a journalist with two decades of experience in radio broadcasting. She currently works in corporate communications at a leading African company in the business process outsourcing industry. Beyond her professional role, Kalicharan serves on the management committee of the 1860 Heritage Centre. 

THE POST