Who are you becoming in 2026?

EVERY January, we’re asked the same questions.

What are your goals? What are you going to achieve? What do you want to change?

And while there’s nothing wrong with ambition, I’ve learned, through living, losing, rebuilding, and beginning again, that these questions are incomplete.

A better question is this: who are you becoming in 2026?

Not what you will accumulate. Not what you will post. Not what you will prove. But who you will be when no one is watching.

For many of us, especially those raised in families that valued duty, resilience, and respectability, we were taught how to succeed long before we were taught how to feel. We learned to be strong, responsible, dependable. We learned to show up. We learned to keep going. What we didn’t always learn was how to pause. How to listen to ourselves. How to honour what hurts instead of pushing through it. And so we mastered survival, but forgot about fulfilment.

Emotional intelligence isn’t a buzzword. It’s a life skill. It’s the quiet ability to notice what’s happening inside you before it spills out into your relationships, your health, or your sense of self. It’s knowing when to speak and when to step back. When to hold on and when to let go. When to say yes and when a loving no is necessary.

Becoming emotionally intelligent doesn’t mean becoming soft. In fact, it often requires more courage than brute strength ever did. It takes courage to admit you’re tired of being “the strong one". Courage to stop performing peace while feeling overwhelmed. Courage to disappoint others so you don’t keep abandoning yourself.

As I step into 2026, I’m less interested in doing more and far more interested in living better. I’m choosing presence over pressure. Alignment over applause. Peace over proving. And I invite you to consider doing the same.

Ask yourself:

- Who am I when I’m not trying to meet expectations?

- What emotions am I avoiding instead of understanding?

- What patterns keep repeating because I haven’t paused long enough to learn the lesson?

You don’t need a long list of resolutions. You need one emotional intention.

Maybe in 2026, you become someone who:

- Responds instead of reacts

- Chooses rest without guilt

- Sets boundaries without explaining yourself to exhaustion

- Speaks honestly, even when your voice shakes.

Becoming is not loud. It’s subtle. It happens in small moments, when you choose yourself kindly, when you tell the truth gently, when you stop existing on autopilot and start living with intention. Life will still be full. Responsibilities won’t disappear. Challenges will remain. But you can change how you meet them. This year, don’t just ask what you want to achieve. Ask who you are becoming because when you become emotionally aware, grounded, and brave enough to live fully, not just survive, everything else begins to align. And that, in my experience, is where fulfilment truly begins.

Lisa Sukdev is a motivational speaker, author, and emotional intelligence advocate. She is the author of Unlocked: Building emotional intelligence for a fulfilling life. Here she explores resilience, self-awareness, and the courage required to live a fulfilled life. Her work encourages people to move beyond survival mode and build emotionally intelligent, purpose-driven lives.

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