Embracing the true spirit of Ramadaan beyond the kitchen

NOT even water? Agh! shame! Yes, fellow South Africans, it’s that time of the year again when all South African Muslims will be asked this question several times a day as we embrace the holy month of Ramadaan.

You may associate Ramadaan with aleem/haleem distributions, samoosas, savoury making, falooda, dates (not the romantic kind) and, of recent, Ramadaan “fits” or workout routines.

Ramadaan is so much more than starving yourself from dawn until dusk. It is a month that allows our beings to reset, recharge and re-align ourselves with our true purpose. A physical cleanse yes, but more importantly, a mental, emotional and spiritual cleanse. Ramadaan should be associated with greater self-reported well-being, spiritual fulfilment, social cohesion and purposeful practice.

Fasting is one of the five pillars of Islam, not just a trend like intermittent fasting, which was only recently discovered by the medical world as beneficial and an effective gut cleansing practice.

Harvard researchers (Campante and Yanagizawa-Drott) studied the broader effects of Ramadaan. They found that they are not just health outcomes, but economic and happiness findings. The mental health and psychological benefits were astounding. It reduced symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress in many participants. Some studies also noted improved cognitive functioning in half of the cases reviewed. From a spiritual and social context, Harvard highlighted that Ramadaan fostered community building through shared iftar (fast-breaking) meals, and supported spiritual reflection and unity among the students, faculty and staff. Of course, the metabolic heath improvements in lipid profiles and weight in some cases, the effects naturally vary by diet, lifestyle and individual.

So now comes my all-important question: how can I better myself and my relationship with the Almighty this year, and not concern myself with my cousin and how many savouries she made for iftar?

Social media and influencers have turned Ramadaan into trending, show-all, tell-all look-book for everyone to see how iftar and suhoor tables must be transformed into MasterChef worthy platings. This, in turn, puts undue and unnecessary stress and anxiety on the working Muslim woman. This is a call to all working Muslim women – this month is bestowed upon you by God Almighty Himself to move closer towards Him and improve your overall well-being, and not be a slave to your kitchen, or Zakirah’s chicken calzone recipe.

This your golden opportunity to absorb the glad tidings, mercy and bounties that the Almighty is freely distributing this month. It is an accepted fact that Islam is such a beautiful religion that serving one’s family is considered a prayer and is rewarded. However, having to juggle your homes, kids, heightened spiritual awareness, charity, cooking and the big one, work, is asking for a month that will exhaust your being as opposed to enhancing it, as the Almighty intended it for you.

Go easy on yourself. This is a reminder to every Muslim this Ramadaan. Charity begins at home.  Be kind, as this too is ibaadah (prayer) to the women in your homes, who are facilitating the functional tasks for their families so you may fast with ease and offer your prayers serenely.

If you find that you cannot speak a kind word to them, or help them with meal preparations so that they too can supplicate without being tired, then all I ask of you is smile at her, as your merciful God has deemed this an ibaadah which is worthy of reward. It is stated in a key Hadith (a report of the words, actions or silent approvals of the Prophet Muhammed peace be upon him) in Sahih Bukhari: “your smiling in the face of your brother is charity.”

Being cognisant the whole time that in the holy month of Ramadaan, the thawab/sawaab (good deed) is doubly rewarded. As stated in a key Hadith (Sahih Muslim 1151e): “every action of the son of Adam is multiplied, with good deeds rewarded ten to 700 times over except for fasting.”

This column is first a reminder to myself, a working Muslim woman who wants to ensure that her family has a beautiful, spiritually-uplifting and beneficial Ramadaan. However, this Ramadaan, I want to shatter the cultural (not religious) norms that have made Ramadaan labour intensive on our mothers, sisters and daughters. Going forward, I want to see more women enjoying this month while still creating a memorable Ramadaan for not only her family, but for herself too.

Ramdaan Kareem. Please remember me in your duas (prayers) as I will remember all of you, especially my beloved mothers and sisters.

Sayed is an award-winning media personality and presenter on the DriveBy on LotusFM from 3pm to 6pm. Find her on Instagram: neelofar.sayed. Facebook: Neelofar Sayed.

Neelofar Sayed is an award-winning media personality and presenter on the DriveBy on LotusFM from 3 to 6pm. Find her on Instagram: neelofar.sayed. Facebook: Neelofar Sayed. 

THE POST