Nompumelelo Magwaza
TAKE any threat of suicide made by a child seriously.
This warning from the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (Sadag) came yesterday as news broke that an 11-year-old boy of Umbumbulu, south of Durban, had apparently hanged himself on Wednesday afternoon.
In a fit of rage after being teased by friends, Mxolisi Nxumalo told his mum and grandmother he was going to kill himself. However, assuming the problem had been solved, neither took him seriously.
Reliving the tragedy yesterday, his mother, Nompumelelo Nxumalo, said Mxolisi had become angry when his friends called him a gorilla and teased him about his dark complexion.
“Mummy, I am going to hang myself” were the first words he said to his mother and grandmother, as he stormed into their house on Wednesday afternoon.
“He was very angry. I have never seen him that angry. He was fuming, saying that he was very upset because his friends had called him a gorilla and a witch, and that they had laughed at him because he was dark,” Nxumalo said.
She said her son had been walking home from school when an argument developed.
The argument escalated and Mxolisi fought with his friends. In retaliation, they called him names.
“I called all his friends and we had a discussion about this.
“When they left, he told me and his grandmother that he was going to kill himself. I did not take him seriously,” said Nxumalo.
She said Mxolisi had not threatened to kill himself before.
“He had a bad temper, but never threatened to kill himself,” she said.
His grandmother, Basline Nxumalo, said Mxolisi hanged himself while she and his mother had accompanied a friend to a bus stop.
“I have never felt so much pain in my life. I was very close to my grandson. I loved him so much, and he was a good boy,” she said.
Mxolisi’s body was found by his uncle S’luleko Nxumalo, who said he was shocked to find his nephew’s body hanging by a rope in his grandmother’s room.
Sadag operations director Cassey Chambers said parents should take suicide threats seriously.
“Parents should take this very seriously. They should ask their children if they mean it.”
She said 75 percent of people who commit suicide give warnings before killing themselves. The warnings are usually in the form of a letter or verbal warnings, and these should all be taken seriously,” she said.
Childline SA director Joan van Niekerk said verbal bullying was far worse than physical bullying, because its effect was more permanent. “Children tease each other all the time, but they do not realise the impact words can have on their mates.
“Parents and teachers should teach their children about the implications of bullying and try and make them understand that it can lead to low self-esteem, which can result in such incidents.”
l Tollfree contact numbers:
SADAG 080 056 7567
Childline 080 005 5555