Nicole Govender with her daughters, Amelia Hope and Elena Faith.
Image: Supplied
TONGAAT mother, Nicole Govender, has opened up about the "haunting suicide note" left by her ex-husband, who killed both her daughters before taking his own life on February 24, and the anguish she continues to endure in the aftermath of the tragedy.
Govender, 37, an IT and software specialist, said she was only allowed to read the suicide note written by her ex-husband, Leon Munsamy, after her interview was published in the POST in March.
She said the suicide note was dated February 23, the day before her daughters, Amelia Hope, 6, and Elena Faith, 4, were found dead.
The girls were allegedly poisoned by their father before he hanged himself.
“The Tongaat SAPS only allowed me to read the note after my story was published in the POST newspaper. The investigating officer came to take my statement and asked if I wanted to read the suicide note,” she said.
Govender described reading the note as “hollow and deeply unsettling”.
“Reading Leon’s note did not give me any closure. There was no valid explanation for what he did. He just said that he was sorry, and that he did what he did because he missed his children.
“In the note, he told me to live my life and be happy. How can I ever be happy after he took my girls away from me? He worded it as if my children were a burden to me,” said an emotional Govender.
The couple had been divorced since August, and Govender revealed that tensions between them had escalated in the days leading up to the tragedy.
According to her, Munsamy had discovered she was in a new relationship and began sending her troubling messages.
“When he found out that I was in a relationship, he sent me messages on my cellphone, gaslighting and mocking me,” she said.
In the note, Govender said, Munsamy not only apologised but included what appeared to be a will, outlining the distribution of his assets.
“On the second page of the suicide note he left a will, talking about his assets. He stated that the car which he asked for in the divorce settlement, and which is still on my name, should be given to his relative.
“In the divorce, Leon claimed a lot of money from me. At the time, I agreed to it because I just wanted to be done with that chapter of my life,” she said.
Govender said she was taken aback when she read that the money should be given to Munsamy’s girlfriend.
“He spoke about his girlfriend, and that the settlement which was due to be paid out this year should go to her. Yet, he always denied that he had a girlfriend.”
Govender rejected the legitimacy of the "so-called will".
“This was a suicide note. He actually wanted 50% of the settlement money to be given to his cousin and the other 50% to his girlfriend.”
Nicole Govender with her daughters, Amelia Hope and Elena Faith.
Image: Supplied
She added that he had meticulously detailed financial matters in the note.
“He said the money in his account, which was the R100,000 I had paid him, should go to his mother. He calculated and laid everything out clearly.”
Govender said in her view, the tone of the note revealed deeper intent.
“Unfortunately, Leon only felt anger for me. He started off apologising in the note, but then all his words were not of a man who felt remorse for what he was about to do. It felt like a man who wanted to hurt me.
"He said in the note ‘I am sorry about doing this but I know you won’t take care of the children the way we did’. There was no ‘we’. He never took care of our children. I did everything for them from the moment they were born. I lived like a ‘single married mother’ for many years.”
Govender claimed in addition to the tragedy, she also faced backlash from the community.
“The most hurtful thing in addition to everything else I am going through, is the amount of people in Tongaat who are blaming me for their deaths. These people do not know me or my story. Leon killed my innocent children, but people are blaming me. How is that fair?”
She added that she had received death threats and was targeted online.
“I cannot even show my face in Tongaat without someone spewing hate at me. I even get death threats which tell me to watch my back as if I am the one who killed my children. There have also been malicious rumours that Leon was not the father of my girls; and that I cheated on him and only wanted his money.
“Content creators even had live video streams on social media, bashing me. They actually got paid to bully me and spread misinformation."
The emotional toll had been overwhelming, she said.
“Everyday is heartbreaking for me. I wake up each day in emotional and physical pain. I am alone in a home I shared with my girls. I am a different person now. I will never be the same again. I struggle to wake up and be normal. The grief has fully hit me now.”
She said the tragedy had also impacted her extended family.
“Many of my family have had health complications after the funeral, and the doctors told us that one of the family members did not have long to live. How do I sit through another funeral?”
She spoke of the painful milestones ahead, including her younger daughter’s birthday.
“Elena’s birthday is in two weeks, on Mother’s Day. She would have been 5 years old. How do I get through the day without them? I watch all my friends with their children knowing that I would never see my girls grow up.”
Govender said she was still waiting for the toxicology report on the cause of her daughters' deaths.
“The Tongaat SAPS said it took six weeks, but the investigating officer was not hopeful I would get it anytime soon,” she said.
“My children were innocent. Leon was a despicable person for taking their lives,” said Govender.