The top F-word topics South Africans never talk about

Published Oct 29, 2024

Share

New research commissioned by Sanlam uncovers a significant insight: South Africans will not openly talk about income, wills, investments and savings, and debt. This silence, highlighted in Sanlam’s research, is a significant barrier to improving financial literacy and confidence.  Now’s the time to talk about the topics we traditionally shy away from. There are myriad benefits to having brave conversations about the F(inance) word.

Mariska Oosthuizen, Chief Marketing Officer at Sanlam, explains that 43% of the 1,581 survey participants said talking about their income is off-limits. Additionally, 33% avoid discussing their wills, 32% avoid conversations about savings or investments, and 30% won’t speak about debt. “It’s difficult to talk about money and mortality for many reasons, from cultural complexities to fear of judgement and wealth guilt.

“Our research shows that a third of people only discuss finances with loved ones every few months or less. There’s a strong need to normalise these conversations as talking about money is linked to better mental well-being, decision-making, and financial outcomes. It also fosters closer, more resilient relationships.”

These insights formed part of Sanlam’s innovative Dirtiest Word campaign, which aims to get Mzansi talking about money. Collaborating with personal finance expert Sam Beckbessinger and some of South Africa’s top comedians, Sanlam recently 'disguised’ a financial literacy course in a stand-up comedy show, designed to encourage South Africans to discuss their financial matters openly. The F-Show, hosted by multi-award-winning comedian Mpho ‘Popps’ Modikoane, cleverly used humour to dismantle the barriers that often hinder discussions about money. Including ‘untouchable’ topics like income.

Why We Should Talk About the “Untouchable” Topics

Income

When asked about our earnings, most of us hesitate. “There’s often ‘wealth guilt’ if we feel we earn more, and a stigma of shame if we earn less,” says Oosthuizen. “Sixty percent of respondents grew up in households where finances were never discussed.”

“You don’t need to disclose exact figures, but being vulnerable about financial challenges and successes can build connection and encourage experience-sharing,” she adds.

Personal finance author Sam Beckbessinger notes, “Silence breeds shame and resentment, turning money into a source of fear and isolation. When you believe you’re the only one struggling, it’s hard to ask for help, leading to spirals of debt and hopelessness. The more open you are about your financial journey, the more you create a safe space for others to do the same.”

Wills

Why don’t South Africans talk about wills? According to Sanlam, an estimated 70% of South Africans do not have one. Reasons range from procrastination to a misconception that estate planning is only for the wealthy. There’s also a reluctance to confront death.

Beckbessinger advises, “Your financial life is intertwined with others, and your decisions impact them. Without a will, the legal system decides who gets what, which can be lengthy and impersonal, leading to financial strain for loved ones.”

She suggests starting conversations with questions like:

Who will inherit the family home, and why?

What big debts need to be settled?

How will differences in financial support be reflected in asset distribution?

What are your wishes for sentimental items?

Discussing these matters openly can prevent future misunderstandings, reduce debt where possible, and ensure everyone is on the same page. There are many tools to start the estate planning process, for example, Sanlam Legacy empowers people to draft a will for free.

Savings and investments

Talking about savings or investments can feel awkward because 47% of participants believe money is too personal to discuss, and 32% don’t want to “show off”. Oosthuizen notes that imposter syndrome and feelings of inadequacy also often play a role. She advocates familiarising children in this world through early immersion, “Letting little people ‘play’ on platforms like Easy Equities and SatrixNOW is a wonderful way to get them comfortable with the basics of investing from the get-go. This early exposure to the magic of compounding returns is invaluable. They can start with as little as R10 ‘pocket money’.”Beckbessinger emphasises that financial success is more about behaviour than products. “You don’t need to master complex financial terms; understanding a few core concepts like assets, compounding, and risk management can make you better with money than most. Building wealth takes time—start early and be patient. Talking about it helps us support each other on this journey.”

Debt

Debt remains a major concern, ranking as the fourth most taboo topic in the survey. Although Sanlam’s Financial Confidence Index reveals that slightly more people are willing to discuss debt this year than last, it’s still a conversation many avoid. On average, South Africans spend 65% of their salaries paying down debt, according to DebtBusters.

Beckbessinger highlights that low financial literacy is a widespread issue. She stresses that at school, you learn about Romeo and Juliet but not credit scores. Only 4 in 10 working South Africans have a certified financial adviser, leaving many without a plan. Conversations are key to sharing knowledge and adopting healthier financial habits. Especially given that so much financial knowledge and many products – like Tax-free Savings Accounts – are new.

Oosthuizen adds, “Demystifying credit starts with getting your credit score to understand your situation and put a plan in place. Sanlam Credit Solutions gives you access to your score and free one-on-one counselling with a coach to create a unique credit roadmap for your situation and goals.”

How to talk about money when we really don’t want to

Sanlam’s money relationship therapist, Registered Trauma Counsellor, and mental health advocate Luxolo Isabelle Dywili advises that discussing uncomfortable financial topics can help heal money traumas, build confidence, and reduce anxiety. She suggests doing a monthly financial check-in with family and friends. “Link the conversation to a news event or social media post to make it organic. Stick to one or two topics, be clear about your goals, and ask open-ended questions. Expressing gratitude for someone’s willingness to have these talks can make the conversation smoother.”

PERSONAL FINANCE