Bliss – if it hadn’t been for the food

Published Apr 4, 2012

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With Santa Claus almost non-existent and the tooth fairy not making her debut yet, Zebu was a welcomed mythical creature to intrigue our three-year-old on a weekend away.

A cross between a zebra and a buck, Zebu exists only at Zebula Golf Estate and Spa, according to the tale, so keep your eyes peeled if you want to catch a fleeting glimpse. My son spent most of his weekend looking for the zebra with the horns, allowing us to relax while egging him on to look more carefully.

A short two-hour drive from Johannesburg into Limpopo lies the home of Zebu, a reserve with herbivores grazing at your doorstep and luxury aplenty. A five-star lodge, intimate chalets or a holiday home await you...with no shortage of amenities.

Opening the doors of the house which we would call home for our short stay, the spaciousness makes the first grand impression. The gourmet kitchen is every cook’s dream and the bedrooms boast king-size beds and a bathroom you could fit an army into. Jacuzzis are a standard feature in every bathroom. That should give you an insight into the plush living quarters.

The entertainment area commands the top floor with your very own bar, complete with ice-maker, bar fridges and a light-up backdrop. Just in case you weren’t convinced that you were at a proper bar, they threw in a pool table.

Two balconies, one on the bottom floor and one at the top, look out on to never-ending vistas of bush with protrusions of giraffe heads and specks of buck, zebras and wildebeest. The top balcony made a fun lookout for Zebu.

The lower balcony steps out on to a fire-pit – complete with chairs attached to table tops for outdoor dining – and a heated rock pool.

Our first bush sunrise greeted us with a herd of giraffes in our backyard, so close that you could ride one. After convincing my son that he could not ride, feed or pet them, we were off to breakfast.

The buffet was generous but not glamorous, and waiting 15 minutes for one fried egg while the rest of my food iced over is not my idea of a hearty brekkie. The service was very disappointing at the lodge. Later in the day lunch took a grand total of 50 minutes to arrive at our table. I had ordered the homemade pie, chips and gravy – not brain surgery I thought. Cold pie, cold chips and lumpy gravy is what I didn’t order and with no waiter in sight to take it back to the kitchen, I had to chomp it down.

Zebula’s has a Bushveld par-72 golf course and the animals roam freely on the greens.

With a plethora of activities to keep the young ’uns and adults busy, you are spoilt for choice. Some experiences are pricey but there are affordable options too. If you choose not to spend the entire day chasing a small ball on the green, you could take an elephant safari, pet a lion cub or watch the cheetah run. Game drives are a must but there are no Big Five on the reserve. That would prove interesting when you wake up to find a leopard in your backyard. “No, son, you cannot ride, pet or feed the leopard.”

You could also opt for a horseback game ride, or a walk through the reserve. The favourite among visitors is the quad bike safaris.

We watched a python eat an entire rabbit for lunch at the reptile park. I doubt the python would have been too fussed if his food was served cold. The cheetah run was a glance rather than an activity. They ran past so fast, and with so few cheetahs doing the sprint, I didn’t quite grasp the concept.

The lion cubs are so cuddly and cute, I planned a safe escape route to kidnap one but I doubt I would have made it past the main gate. For the more adventurous, there is clay shooting, paintball, archery and fishing.

A refreshing spa treatment will always be on my list of to-do-things on holiday. Ever wonder why at most holiday resorts they have removed the gym and replaced it with a spa? It makes perfect sense to me. The price of the treatments are market-related and you could enjoy a back, neck and shoulder massage for the same price you would pay at a spa in Joburg.

To be quite honest, I could have spent the entire weekend holed up in the cottage. There are very few places that I have been that I remember feeling total bliss, sitting out on the top floor balcony, looking out onto the sun setting behind the grazing animals.

And if you look close enough, you might even spot Zebu, which my son claimed he spotted at least five times… - Saturday Star

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